Sunday, April 10

eventful day today i can say.
woke up at 8am in the morning for home visit, to an old-aged home. i was so sleepy, while i was on the way there, i was still thinking "damnn, why must we do cip..." but i was so wrong to be complaining and grumbling, i feel so guilty and ashamed of myself. seriously. what i saw there really affected me. most of the elderly couldnt even eat by themselves. some are blind, some are deaf, some are dumb( dumb sounds so bad! i mean they couldnt talk). some had trouble swallowing, and some kept groaning. like they're groaning in pain. i dont know, i just felt a pain in my heart.
i talked to a few of them, the healthier ones. there's this old lady who's quite plump. she's very talkative, kept talking to me and engteck. actually not really talking to me cos i coudnt speak dialect, i was just sitting there listening and nodding. it was heart-warming to know that there are still healthy and happy people there. but actually, she was the only one i saw who was happy. talked to another lady who has very brittle bones. she's so skinny and her skin was so thin u could see all her veins. she told us about her past, about her being a canteen vendor in a school. i could communicate with her cos she spoke chinese!
the nurse was chatting with my ct and i overheard her telling her there's this elderly who was living there, she herself knew she was going to die, so she asked the nurse to call her children to come. but all her children came up with excuses. she waited, but none came, until she died, and still, no one came.i was like, really on the verge of tears. then wad i saw next really struck me- an old lady who was sitting on the wheelchair(she has no legs) was feeding another old lady who's deaf and coudnt talk. it really struck me. what have i been doing all these while?? i've never done anything good, i've never contributed to the society, i've never done my part to reach out for people who needs help. even an old lady who's cripple can do so much, just what was i doing all these while? where was i? i dont know. it just never occur to me to reach out to such people out there in my lifestyle. yea sometimes i'll pity those people they feature during nkf shows and i'll call the hotlines. but this is so not enough!
i'll try to do my part for such people whenever i have the chance. or perhaps, i should create such chances myself. i really do hope so.
lunched with abby, fion and my beloved ct after that. she was still waiting for her friend so we invited her to join us for lunch. i mean, it's basic cortesy to ask right? so she was sat facing me opposite the small table in mos burger. oh my it was so awkward. i dont hate her as much now, but.. i dont know, i cant seem to talk to her like i do to other teachers.
kenneth's party in the evening. went with my darling wanching. she's so funny i love chatting with her! we'll go out soon again okie my dearrr.

long entry huh.

Sunday, April 3

i want to hold those memories dearly. i'm afraid of losing them.
so can the world stop spinning, can familiar places stop changing,
and will you replay those memories with me again.

Friday, April 1

sch ended at like 11.15 today. which is super duper early! compared to 5.15 on mon. was supposed to end at 2.45 with a 3hr break in between, but shifted gp lesson up since mrs ang wasnt here for bio tut today. anyway, watched super-sized me during gp. it's abt a guy eating mcdonald's 3 meals a day for 30days. it's gross. mcdonald's is disgusting. haha, hopefully i'll still think like this for the rest of my life and i'll never be tempted to eat those unhealthy stuffs every again. quite impossible though. or should i say, it's definitely impossible.

slacked at home for the whole day. watched tv, read mags, naps. i enjoyed it actually, havent done that for a long time. and i had a really sweet dream!(damn sister woke me up for dinner) ooohh..and i'm dreaming of u tonight, till tomorrow, i'll be holding u tight.. i'm mad. tgif! i love weekends.